Got this in the mail from Kranzloid this morning (can’t give credit where it is due, as the author is unknown) and thought it funny enough to want to share with some of you.
What a world!
In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual relations with a male animal is punishable by death.
(Like THAT makes sense.)
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In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s genitals, but is prohibited from looking directly at them during the examination. He may only see their reflection in a mirror.
(Do they look different reversed?)
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Muslims are banned from looking at the genitals of a corpse. This also applies to undertakers. The sex organs of the deceased must be covered with a brick or piece of wood at all times.
(A brick?)
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The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.
(Much worse than ‘going blind!’)
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There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them for the privilege of having sex for the first time. Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for virgins to marry.
(Let’s just think for a minute; is there any job anywhere else in the world that even comes close to this?)
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In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare hands. The husband’s illicit lover, on the other hand, may be killed in any manner desired.
(Ah! Justice!)
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Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England – but only in tropical fish stores.
(But of course!)
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In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her husband, and the first time this happens, her mother must be in the room to witness the act.
(Makes one shudder at the thought.)
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In Santa Cruz, Bolivia, it is illegal for a man to have sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.
(I presume this was a big enough problem that they had to pass this law?)
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In Maryland, USA it is illegal to sell condoms from vending machines with one exception: Prophylactics may be dispensed from a vending machine only ‘in places where alcoholic beverages are sold for consumption on the premises.’
(Is this a great country or what? Well, not as great as Guam!)
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Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.
(Who volunteers for these tests?)
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The ant can lift 50 times its own weight, can pull 30 times its own weight and always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.
(Did our government pay for this research??)
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Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Ah, geez.)
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An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain..
(I know some people like that.)
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Starfish don’t have brains.
(I know some people like that, too.)
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And, the best for last?
Turtles can breathe through their butts. (And I thought I had bad breath in the morning!)
Thank you all for reading this, if you need to reach me in the future I will be in Guam!!


13 comments
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May 11, 2009 at 2:07 am
Me
Most of these are false. I checked it out personally because for a moment there I wanted to migrate to Guam..
May 11, 2009 at 4:45 am
javajones
Me – Thanks for letting me know. Most of them sound too weird to be true – but then again some folk (and countries) are so sick, one never can tell!
May 11, 2009 at 6:55 am
Gypsy
Still, it gave me a good laugh.
Thanks for that JJ
May 11, 2009 at 10:55 am
Tulie
Well atleast ‘Me’ checked first. Goodness knows how many male bloggers took the first plane out to Guam already
May 11, 2009 at 11:53 am
javajones
Gypsie – my pleasure!
Tulie – Right! I hope RD curbed his compulsive nature and checked first before heading out there!!
May 11, 2009 at 12:39 pm
T
while all you men are heading over to Guam, I might go to Hong Kong to see whats what.
Hilarious stuff Java!
May 11, 2009 at 1:04 pm
Some people do run out of things to say… « Pada Show
[...] friend it seems Javajones has finally run out of things to say. So now he’s blogging an email forward that everyone else got 20 years ago. He woke up this morning and went ‘Holy fucknuts! [...]
May 11, 2009 at 3:45 pm
RD
Hello all,
I can’t leave a long comment as I’m in Guam at the moment. Must dash.
May 11, 2009 at 11:12 pm
javajones
T – that’s one way of getting over it, huh?!!! Hope all is well.
RD – Whatever you do, don’t stop over at Singapore!
May 12, 2009 at 11:18 am
Kalusudda
$1000 daily fine if you serve duck liver (foie Gras) in Berkeley restaurants! But you can see ducks, roasted hanging in every Chinese restaurant. It is perfectly legal to serve them.
Case in point is it is cruel to over feed the ducks to get bigger fatty livers, (it is less cruel to kill them.)
May 12, 2009 at 11:27 pm
javajones
The law against fois gras originated due to the force-feeding of the ducks or geese, in which case I would agree with it. So the next time you order it try to find out if this was the case.
Cheers!
May 13, 2009 at 5:32 am
Gallicissa
Guam sure is a country to be!
I hear it is also good for birds with many endemics – some of the sadly have gone extinct due to an introduced Boiga.
Nasty reply to RD.
May 13, 2009 at 6:23 am
javajones
Hey Amila – yeah the invasive number in Guam with regard to Boiga sp. has been well documented. Major disaster! Apparently quite a number of endemic bird species got knocked out because of them.
If the law with regard to virgins (as reported above) is actually so, then I guess the invasion of bloggers subsequent to this report may well result in endemic virgins also getting knocked out (or should that be knocked ‘up’?)!