Went to this celebration of a wedding anniversary last night – of one of the families closest to the heart or I probably wouldn’t have gone. Not to put ‘anniversary celebrations’ down or anything, but I guess it’s an individual thing where celebrating ‘events’ on their respective ‘birthdays’ measured in terms of one year, is sort of worthless to me. I know – I’m in a miniscule minority – but that’s just the way it is. Now I’m not referring to the ‘party’ aspect at all – good company, good music, good spacing-out and good times are most welcome, but if those aspects were to be missing from the celebration, then the actual event itself is a most unappealing prospect – for me.

And giving this aspect of my character some thought, I wondered why I felt this way about birthdays, other anniversaries, and most times about weddings and funerals as well. A little introspective reflection eked out a few ‘reasons’ for this and most of it had to do with ‘hypocrisy’ or levels of it. What the hell is the point of spending (wasting?) time doing something that is obviously not enjoyable? The obligatory attendance at various functions that are a total pain in the ass, making small and mostly banal conversation with individuals, most of who are undoubtedly decent and well-meaning and who may be genuinely fond of you, somehow becomes a problem. The attendance at weddings of folk who may not be the closest and often quite distant, but who feel obliged to invite you to attend for whatever reason they have, is another major bummer for me. And funerals are the pits, when it doesn’t concern someone who is genuinely near and dear. The Dancer doesn’t quite see it my way, so it does lead to moments of distress on occasion, but with the passage of time this too has petered out and we generally do our own thing – except for those ‘family affairs’ that demand a presence, else offense and hurt sensibilities ensue.

The other ‘obligatory’ number connected to this phenomenon is the giving of presents. For me, giving someone a present purely because it is ‘the done thing’ is of no value at all. I much prefer to give someone a present out of a genuine desire – and it doesn’t have to be a birthday or anniversary for this. For children, on the other hand, it is a different matter. The conventional events that demand this ritual have already been conditioned into the makeup of the child, so not adhering to the practice will inevitably cause some amount of grief, so that practice, for me, is acceptable – although…weelll, never mind!

Anyways – getting back to last night’s anniversary celebration: It was a special evening with friends – super music, great food, wonderful company, a fine selection of inebriants, excellent vibes and a super time was had by all. But what struck me most was that we frequently have such evenings and it doesn’t need to be some anniversary of an event in the life of someone to ‘celebrate’, although I guess that this would be a good ‘excuse’ or ‘reason’ to gather together folk that the ‘celebrator’ would like (or feel obliged) to get together. So maybe this is the main reason, but for me at any rate, the problem remains.

I guess I’m really pretty weird – or am I??

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