Saw this piece in Newsweek that made me flash instantly on RD – no doubt due to his earlier posts on, and fairly consistent references to taking a crap, different types of turds, wiping himself and other related issues. The short article is titled ‘Wiping is washed up’ and relates to the differences brought about between washing one’s butt after taking a crap, against wiping it with toilet paper.
Apparently a “classic survey” revealed that half the ‘paper’ users “..spend their days with fecal contamination – anything from wasp coloured stains to frank massive feces in their underpants”. Uurrggghh and yuuuccckkk! In spite of this, it was also reported that Americans “continue to mock the bidet..”. However, the crux of the piece is not just a matter of commenting on personal hygiene, but more importantly, it reflects on the future of the planet.
We are told that the average American uses 57 sheets of toilet paper a day, which means that collectively, they burn through 36.5 billion rolls each year – which also means that “tossing all the TP in America would save 15 million trees, 17.3 terawatts of electricity, and more than 473 billion gallons of water annually”. We are also told that “the environmental impact of bidets is minimal in comparison”.
So! Isn’t it time that the folk that are so concerned about personal hygiene and spend billions of dollars on advertising and advertised related products, think about the traces of crap they carry around almost all the time? And what about all those ‘Green’ brothers and sisters who wipe – shouldn’t they switch to water from paper?
Both Java and I prefer the less cumbersome and more environmentally-friendly bidet-spray to the bidet itself, but that’s just a personal preference. And ‘personally’ we don’t give a crap whether folk wash or wipe themselves – unless of course we have reason to be intimate with them. The fate of the planet, however, could well hang in the balance.
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August 26, 2009 at 4:53 am
Sach
Imagine the next GreenPeace conference;
DON’T WIPE. WASH!!!
August 26, 2009 at 5:57 am
Chavie
Bidet sprays FTW! 😀
August 26, 2009 at 7:08 am
RD
Java – Excuse my ignorance here but when you say bidet spray are you referring to one of those shower head type things, that can be hand held and used in a, ahem, localised nature?
As for me? I’m now a fully fledged convert to the wet wipe and dry wipe approach.
August 26, 2009 at 7:15 am
javajones
RD – okay you’re excused!!! Yeah, those are the ones you could (should!) use – its a lot easier, more hygienic and better for the planet.
August 27, 2009 at 2:42 am
Gallicissa
I wipe at home, I wipe in the jungles, I wipe with pride and I am a proud wiper.
I like this method because it is quick and helps to maintain a dry toliet, which are important considerations for me. I wash myself twice a day – so I I take good care of my hiegene.
August 27, 2009 at 2:55 am
javajones
Hey Amila – you can be quick and also maintain a ‘dry toilet’ without wiping man – unless you’re using something other than a bidet or bidet-spray. Anyway, I guess the last two sentences spell out our views on this issue pretty clearly…
Cheers!
August 27, 2009 at 3:22 am
Gallicissa
The trouble I see with budet-spray approach is when there are multiple users. Not everybody is so meticulous about keeping things dry for the next user….
August 27, 2009 at 4:05 am
javajones
Amila – We try to avoid public toilet use as much as possible, so mostly the use is at home where folk are reasonably considerate about such things. But in the end “to each his/her own” and if we do care about the planet (assuming the stats in the piece are true) then the ones who care should do what they must…
I must say I couldn’t quite figure out that “wipe with pride” and “proud wiper” bit
August 27, 2009 at 4:18 am
javajones
Chavie – I have no idea what you meant by FTW. Could it be ‘fuck the world’, or is it something else???
Sach – Right! Or WASH, DON’T WIPE. Good slogan!
August 27, 2009 at 5:05 am
Chavie
lol, it just means ‘for the win’ but a lot of people (mis?)interpret it as ‘fuck to world’ too! 😀
August 27, 2009 at 5:19 am
Gallicissa
…because wiping is deemed unhygienic by majority here.
FTW: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=ftw
August 27, 2009 at 11:36 am
javajones
Thanks Chavie..
Amila – from the results of that ‘classic survey’ referred to by Newsweek, it sure looks like that majority you refer to is more right than wrong..
Thanks for the reference check.
August 28, 2009 at 5:21 pm
Gallicissa
Java, statistics are like mini-skirts, they reveal less than what they hide.
August 29, 2009 at 1:31 am
javajones
Amila – right – depending on one’s point of view, of course!!
August 31, 2009 at 12:28 pm
cricket worldcup
Great site, I now have you bookmarked to come back again.
September 3, 2009 at 4:52 am
thekillromeoproject
You gotta use water…!! That’s why it used to be called a ‘Water Closet’ ya?
September 3, 2009 at 5:18 am
javajones
killromeo – right! Tell that to RD…
September 4, 2009 at 11:26 am
T
since we’re talking about bathroom habits.. http://www.treehugger.com/files/2007/05/the_limited_flush_if_its_yellow.php
September 5, 2009 at 11:53 am
javajones
Thanks T – the newer ‘dual-flushes’ are pretty good water-savers, but I also think that flushing only when necessary is a good idea.
September 24, 2009 at 12:59 pm
Tony Brown
I don’t know If I said it already but …Hey good stuff…keep up the good work! 🙂 I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks,)
A definite great read..Tony Brown
October 13, 2009 at 8:59 am
javajones
Hey Tony – sorry for the late response, but I only just found your comment in the spam thingy. Thanks!
November 27, 2009 at 11:18 pm
maria
i wash my asshole,then dry it with toilet paper.
November 28, 2009 at 1:24 am
javajones
Maria – good on you…
July 6, 2010 at 5:50 pm
JimmyJames
Screw the planet. DO NOT WASH – it increases the chance of fungal and other bacterial infections passing through your mucus membranes in both the penis and the rectum.
July 6, 2010 at 11:14 pm
javajones
Jimmy – perhaps your technique needs refining…